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How To Not Care What Other People Think Of You

Do You Care What People Think?I can’t think of a more important topic to write about than this. If you want to thrive in this world and do great things; If you want to have an impact on people’s lives; If you want be happy and live stress-free: You have to stop caring what other people think of you. It’s absolutely necessary to freely express yourself. It’s the only way to be an originator, a leader, and a creator.

Unfortunately, it’s difficult to stop caring about people’s opinions. It’s in our nature to want to fit in and be accepted by our peers. There is a certain comfort that comes along with feeling accepted. However, if this desire to be accepted becomes the driving force in your life, you will become a watered down version of yourself, frightened to do anything that might attract criticism.

And that’s not what you want, is it? But, we’ve all been afraid to express ourselves at some point in our lives. If you haven’t been afraid to show the world something you’ve created, you’re probably not taking enough chances. The act of creating requires you to stand out from the pack and be an individual…voluntarily. This takes guts, the kind of guts that all Mancredible readers should strive to have.

2 things to remember next time you start to worry about someone’s opinion…

1. Nobody cares about you as much as you – People are extremely self-centered. And it makes sense: we’re trapped in our bodies and being ‘you’ is all that ‘you’ know. Everyone is living in their own first person shooter, and so we spend all of our time thinking about ourselves. In fact, most criticism people give is merely a reflection of how they feel about themselves.

So, next time you start to worry what someone is thinking about you, remind yourself that they are most likely thinking about themselves, that they have better things to do than think about you. Keep it in perspective, what may have felt like a big deal in your life probably meant very little in their lives.

2. Worrying is pointless – Worrying what someone thinks about you is faulty on three fronts. First, you don’t even know what they think of you or why they feel that way. Second, there is little you can do to change their opinion of you. Third, you shouldn’t care about their opinion anyways, worry about living up to your own standards, not theirs.

By time it’s gotten far enough for you to be worrying, it’s probably too late. There’s never a reason to regret the past because it can’t be changed. And there’s never a reason to worry about the future because you can’t control the future. All that you control is what you do now, in this moment.

7 ways to stop caring what other people think

1. Stop second-guessing yourself. Think before you act, but when you act, be decisive and move on with your life. There is no reason to playback events over and over, ruminating over whether you made the right decision. Put everything in perspective and ask yourself whether it will matter in 1 month. Chances are that it won’t, so let it be.

2. Stop letting others’ opinions influence your self-worth and confidence. As long as you seek external validation in the form of praise, admiration, compliments, awards, etc, you will never be secure in yourself. As long as you are alive, someone will hold a negative opinion of you, and the more successful you are, the more this is true. You can’t control opinions, so why let them control the way you feel?

3. Practice putting yourself ‘out there’. Instead of waiting until the game is on the line, why not practice putting yourself in tough situations that don’t matter so you can develop a tough skin? Start conversations random girls, throw yourself into the center of a dance circle, write an article and share it with people. Make yourself vulnerable now so that you can have immunity to criticism when you really need it.

4. Those that truly care will always support you. You should never be afraid to express yourself because those who are there for you will still be there for you. The other people don’t matter.

5. Accept the fact that you will make mistakes. Nobody is perfect. And even if you were perfect, you can’t control the outcomes to your actions. And even if you could control the outcomes, you still can’t control people’s reactions to them. And if you control everything, congratulations, you are God and I’m honored to have you as a reader.

6. Focus on your success. There’s always a bright spot somewhere in your life, find it and use it to empower you to do things that scare you.

7. Extinguish fear by taking action. Ever found yourself dreading a phone call? You put it off and worry. You find other things that allow you to procrastinate. Then you finally force yourself to call, expecting the worst….and it really isn’t so bad. You could have saved yourself a lot of stress by taking immediate action. Doing something has a way of quieting the negative voice inside of you. Next time you are worried about someone’s opinion, instead of worrying about it, do something about it. Talk to them, talk to someone else, write about it in a journal, do something you love to do so you can move past it. Anything is better than thinking about it and getting stressed out.

Challenge

I highly recommend you implement some of the above tips in your life so that you can develop self-confidence like a rock and really start living carefree. To start your training, pick one of the following and do it today:

-Introduce yourself to someone you don’t know and have a 5 minute conversation

-Get the phone number of a girl you think is out of your league

-Go to a public place and yell at the top of your lungs, then just stand there and allow everyone to look at you

Practice putting yourself out there. Build your “I don’t give a shit” muscle. Do it now.

If you found this helpful, share it with a friend or practice voicing your opinion in the comments. If you want the latest, subscribe to the feed or join the email list. Thanks for reading!

(This article was written by me (Scott) but originally posted on another website. Now it’s here)

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  • Mother Hydra

    Thank your for the insight, this continues to be a daily struggle. Reading these tips helps to reinforce the learned behavior of “not giving a fuck” when the moment gets tense- thus I’m more likely to have pause and make decisions that aren’t based on conforming.

    • http://scottbold.com/ Scott Bold

      I’m glad you got something from the article. Thanks for reading. I don’t want you to think I’m perfect or that anyone else is for that matter. We all struggle with being self-conscious sometimes. In fact, that’s another good reason not to worry too much about other’s opinions, because they are just as busy worrying about yours. Good luck

  • Pingback: The Fucked Up Truth You're Not Ready To Hear | Scott Bold Is Here

  • http://www.engineeringtheepic.blogspot.com/ Alixandrea Murphy

    This is great stuff. Really encouraging and just enough in-your-face to make me want to make some sort of action and take your advice. Came here from the r/hownottogiveafuck…was not disappointed.

    • http://scottbold.com/ Scott Bold

      Thanks for the feedback. I’m glad you got something from the article.

  • Nasrin

    Love the article. I feel better about myself already! Thank you so much. I found your site via google and have subscribed.

    • http://scottbold.com/ Scott Bold

      Awesome! I’m glad to have you as a subscriber. I hope you continue to comment. Never hesitate to reach out to me. :)

  • Mandy

    It makes so much sense and has definitely helped to put it all in perspective..I tend to believe that most of the issues are to do with self confidence..I think if I can build on my self confidence other peoples judgements won’t affect me as much..loved da article :))

    • http://scottbold.com/ Scott Bold

      Thanks for commenting. I’m glad you enjoyed the article. I’m a big believer that your outward experience in life is largely determined by your own beliefs, perspective, and inner self confidence. Good luck on your journey!

  • Audrey Majors

    I love this. Just what I needed today. Best of luck on your adventures :)